Bloody Americans!
by SilverSnitch69
Summary: Why do I always let you drag me to these things, Potter? Because secrectly you're a masochist and you love spending time with your family, love. HD a series of fun stories.
1. Chapter 1

**Author:** SilverSnitch69

**Rating: **T

**Disclaimer:** Neither do I, nor my partner in crime/beta, own Harry Potter or any related characters. We just use them in our twisted little stories for our, and soon to be your, sick pleasure.

**Warning: **This is slash, so I hope you know what that means, if not, then I don't know what to tell you. Post-Hogwarts, and the relationship has been established. Implied m-preg, though we don't go into the details.

* * *

**Howdy Ya'll!**

**By: SilverSnitch69**

"Christian! Brian! Come over here! We have to be seated first."

"But I want to sit by the window!"

"Keep your voice down."

"Nah huh, I want to sit over there."

"No! By the window."

"Christian! Brian! Be quiet. Potter, tell your children to be silent."

Sigh "Chris, Brian, listen to your father."

"'K" "'K"

Sigh "Why did I agree to come here again?"

"Because… you once told me how great it would be if all of us went out to eat together like, and I quote, one big happy family, end quote."

"I should of bitten my tongue."

"Papa? Doesn't that hurt?"

"Not as much as being here, sweetheart."

"Dray, give it a chance, will you? Besides, I've read some great reviews on this place and it doesn't look that bad."

"Yeah, the tasteless wall paper and the bull-horn theme doesn't look half bad once you get use to it."

"Dray…"

"Are they real, daddy?"

"Top of the morning to you! Now, how many in your group?"

"Well, let me see, since we're the only ones standing here, I'll say four."

"Draco, be nice."

"Oki-dok! Please follow me, you fine looking cowboys."

"She is too damn perky for this ungodly hour."

"Dray, it's only ten in the morning."

"Exactly my point, I mean…Christian! Get over here before I ground you until your old enough to know what boys like to do with girls in their free time!"

"Play twister?"

"Yes, baby, play twister."

"But I want to touch the horns."

"For the last time, you can't. Besides, you don't know what type of diseases they have. It's not like they look even remotely sanitary to begin with."

"Draco, you're scaring the children."

"It's not like you're doing anything to stop your child from running rampant. And maybe this way they'll be less incline to go and touch one. "

"Hey! He is yours as much as mine. Besides, I'm holding Brian. You're just too lazy to carry him."

"He's seven! He could walk."

"Here we are! Now, you just settle down and I'll leave you here with the menus. I'll be right back in a few to take your orders."

"In a few what?"

"God, I need coffee."

Giggle " Papa, you always drink that juky stuff."

"Yes, well, that juky stuff, as you put it, is what keeps me going."

"Chris, please sit down before your father pops a vein. Wait until he's had his coffee."

"Potter! Don't encourage him. Now Christian, Sit. Down. Or Merlin help me if you don't…"

"I want ice cream!"

"Brian, it's breakfast time. You can't have ice cream yet."

"I want a cheese burger!"

"That's too bloody American."

"Draco, don't curse in front of the children."

"Bloody Americans!"

"See what you did, Draco? Now they're starting to sound like you."

"You make it sound like that's a bad thing."

"They're only four."

"Hey! I'm bloody seven-years-old."

"Chris, stop cursing or I wont let you have ice cream for dessert."

"Sorry."

"That's ok, just don't do it again."

Giggle "Bloody."

"Brian, you too."

"Sorry, daddy."

"The omelets look good. Potter, what are you having?"

"Papa, why do you call Daddy 'Potter'?"

"Because your father keeps forgetting he's married."

"No, I don't. That's what the ring is for. And it's a habit to keep calling you Potter."

"Yeah, even if we share the same last name."

"Papa, can I have pancakes?"

"How many do you want?"

"This many."

"Brian, I don't think you can eat ten pancakes. Uncle Weasel, maybe, but not you."

Giggle. "You called Uncle Ron 'Weasel'"

"Chris, don't say that. Draco, you are really giving our children bad habits."

"What? It just came out."

"Uh huh. Sure, whatever you say, dear."

"Howdy ya'll! My name is Peg, and I'll be your server today. Now, how can I be a service to you?"

"How about toning it down on the perky-ness."

"Draco…"

"Oh my god, how cute! I really love your accent. Where are ya'll from anyways?"

"Potter, please tell me she is kidding me."

"Papa's house!" "Wiltshire!"

"Oh! Is that in Ireland or something?"

Thud.

Giggle.

"Umm…is he going to be alright there?"

Sigh. "Yes, he just needs his coffee. Black. No sugar."

"Oki-dok. Coffee. No sugar. Anything to eat for the young man?"

"How about a large portion of rat poison? Mixed with your strongest liquor would be nice."

"Draco, please."

Giggle

"Oh, my! I do love your sense of humor. Now! What can I really get you?"

"Ok, how about your…" "He'll have an omelet with extra peppers, sausage and toast. Wheat if you have any."

"Yes, we do. Now, how about you, stranger?"

"I'll have the same but without the extra peppers. Instead I want extra cheese, bacon instead of sausage and white bread for my toast."

"Do you always order the same thing when you go out?"

"No, sometimes he actually lets me order my own food."

Laugh.

"Oh my goodness, you are a funny little critter, aren't you?"

"I do try."

Giggle. "Ok, how about for the youngens?"

"I want this many pancakes, peas."

"Brian, we agreed that you can't eat that many."

"Yes, I can!"

"No, you can't. Only Uncle Weasel, remember? And it's not 'peas' it's 'please' with an L. "

"Ok, I'll have this many."

"He'll have two with strawberry topping."

"I like strawbewies."

Sigh "When we get home, I'm going to teach you how to speak properly. I wont allow my son to walk around speaking horribly like some commoner."

"Draco, he's only four."

"So? At his age, I was able to both speak and fence properly."

"Yeah, but he doesn't have a Death Eater father who was bent on making his own son into his mirror image, now does he?"

"Potter, what the hell does…" "So, what will the other little critter be havin' ?"

"Umm… the same but with…"

"No! I want a cheese burger!"

"Chris, you can't eat a whole cheese burger. You always leave almost half of it un-touched."

"No I don't!"

"Christian, stop arguing with your father. He'll have apple as a topping instead."

"And side orders of sausages with scramble eggs, please."

"Alright, so that'll be two omelets; extra peppers for blondie and extra cheese, for you sugar; sausages for grumpy here and bacon for you; wheat for him and white for you while two orders of flapjacks for the critters here. One strawberry and one apple. With a side order of sausages and scramble eggs. Am I correct on your orders, my fine gents?"

"Yes."

"Okay-dok, now I'll just take this here paper to Bob in the back and bring you your coffee. Would the little youngsters like anything to drink?"

"Milk, please if you would."

"I want chocolate in mine, please."

"Me too!"

"How adorable! I'll make sure to put extra chocolate sauce in both your glasses."

"I'll appreciate if you don't. I don't want my children's teeth to start rotting at such a young age."

"I'll see what I can do, sir."

"Finally! I thought she would never leave."

"She isn't that bad, you know."

"Please! She asked where we came from! And don't me get started on her name."

"Well, that was kinda odd. You'd think she'd at least know which country she was working in."

"Exactly! Because come on! How dense can you be? She is surrounded by British people daily. She is probably a British herself!"

"Maybe she was trying to keep in character, you know? To go with the whole theme of the place?"

"Well they got the name right, that's for sure. Who in their right mind would name their child Peg? Were they looking at a person with a wooden leg and just suddenly decided, Hey! I think I'll name my child Peg!"

"Draco, would you keep it down, the lady from across is starting to give us weird looks."

"So? Like I really give a hoot. She could stare all she wants; you know I look good."

Sigh. "Even after all these years, you are still full of yourself."

"Why is Papa full? He hasn't eat yet."

"It's 'eaten', baby. And don't listen to your daddy, he doesn't know what he is talking about."

"Here we are! Two glasses of chocolate milk, a strong cup of coffee, and Oh, my! I didn't get you anything, sugar. What would you'll be havin'"

"A glass of orange juice would be great, thanks."

"Right, I'll be right back with your juice, cutie."

"Potter, if she pinches your cheek one more time I'll…"

Giggle "Papa is jealous."

"Yeah, you're jealous because that lady is paying more attention to Daddy than she is to you."

"Don't be ridiculous. Me? Jealous? What do I have to be jealous about, especially from a woman named Peg?"

"Draco, I can't help it if she does that. It's not like I can just simply tell her to back off."

"Fine, if you wont then I will."

"Draco, you wouldn't?"

"Scared, Potter?"

"Maybe."

"Here you are! Sorry about that, green eyes… umm… Oh! And here are the little critters flapjacks. I'll be back with your omelets."

"Draco, did you really have to glare at the poor woman? She is only doing her job."

"What? You said you didn't want me to tell her, so I didn't. And since when is pinching the patrons' cheeks part of the job description? "

"Yeah, but glaring? You scared her half to death. I almost thought she would drop the plate on my head."

"You wouldn't of even felt it anyways."

Giggle "Daddy has a hard head."

"Umm… here you are, sirs. Enjoy your meal…umm… if you need anything, just hollar. Bye!"

"Funny, she doesn't have that annoying accent anymore."

"I wonder why?"

"What? Don't look at me. I didn't do anything."

"Just eat your eggs, Draco."

"Harry, you know I'm not that flexible."

Choke. Cough.

"Are you ok, Daddy?"

"I'm fine, Chris. Eat your pancakes."

Giggle

"What are you laughing at, Brian?"

"At that man over there. He funny."

"Brian, don't point."

"Oh my god."

Giggle

"Draco, don't stare it's rude."

"But, Harry, look. You can't just sit there and not have a peak."

"Draco, for the love of… just don't make it so obvious. He might notice."

Giggle

"How can that man just sit there like that?"

"Draco! Please, as my husband, just stop staring and eat your food."

"But, Harry, he is so…"

"Ugly."

"Chris, not so loud! And for the love of Merlin, Draco stop staring."

"But, Harry, I can't help it. It's not like you can help but ogle at him. He is just so…"

"Chris, don't you dare say anything."

"What! I wasn't!"

"Sure you weren't. I know you."

"I wasn't! I was going to say if you would pass me a bloody napkin."

"Christian! What did your father say about cursing?"

"Oh god."

Chuckle "You couldn't help it, could you Potter? The temptation was too great for you."

"I think I'm going to be sick."

Snort "I've seen worse."

"Oh, yeah, where?"

"You're friends with Weasel and you're asking me where?"

Giggle. Giggle

"Did you just call Ron ugly?"

"Pass me the pepper, dear."

**The End**

**

* * *

**

**A/N: **I really do hope you enjoyed reading this little story. It came to me on the way back home after my father took me out to eat breakfast. The two little boys were, in fact, real people, though I did change their names. They had come in with their mother and grandmother and had been seated across from us. One of the boys, the older one coincidently, coulnd't sit still, so in my story, I based little Chris and Brian on the both these two boys. The lady from across the table that was giving Harry and Draco weird looks in the story, is actually based on me because I, too, was giving the little kids looks because of their loud and annoying behaviour. I want to thank my beta, Gryffindorgrl86 (Stupy), for looking over the story.

R&R


	2. Have you seen my shirt?

**Author: SilverSnitch69**

**Rating: T**

**Disclaimer: Neither do I, nor my partner in crime/beta, own Harry Potter or any related characters. We just use them in our twisted little stories for our, and soon to be your, sick pleasure.**

**Warning: This is slash, so I hope you know what that means, if not, then I don't know what to tell you. Post-Hogwarts, and the relationship has been established. Implied m-preg, though we don't go into the details.**

**

* * *

**

**"Have you seen my shirt?"**

"Draco, baby, have you seen my other black sock?"

"It's in the third drawer on the left."

"Are you sure? I've checked and it's not there."

"What do you mean it's not there? Check again."

"Draco, I've checked twice and I'm telling you, it's not there."

"Well, you know what they say, third's the charm."

Sigh. "Are you sure you don't know where it is? I really like those socks."

"Bloody hell, Potter! I told you it's in the third drawer. I put them in there myself."

"Well they aren't there."

"Move over! God, it's like you can't do anything on your own."

"I can do things on my own, thank you very much."

"Oh, but finding a simple sock is way too much for you, isn't it?"

"No it's not! I just can't find the fucking..." "Daddy! Chris is being mean again!'

"What is he doing to you now?"

"I wasn't doing anything!"

"Liar!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"ARE TOO!"

"AM BLOODY WELL NOT!"

"Christian! Brian! Be quiet! Or I swear to Merlin I will do it myself. Do I make myself clear!"

Nods

"I said do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, Papa." "Yes, Father."

"Good. Now what did your father tell you about cursing?"

"Sorry, Daddy."

"Don't worry, Chris but please don't do it again. Now, what were you doing to Brian?"

"I wasn't doing anything to him."

"Liar!"

"Am not!"

"Are..." "Don't you dare finish that sentence, Brian."

Sigh

"Chris...?"

"I wasn't..."

Glare. Sigh. Mumble

"What was that, Chris?"

"I called him a lazy sod."

"Why did you call your brother that?"

"Because he's mean."

"Brian, let your brother answer for himself. Potter, here is your goddamn sock. It was exactly where I told you it was."

"Thanks. Now, Chris..."

"Because! He wouldn't help me take our trunks down to the foyer."

"Didn't it occur to you that maybe the trunks were too heavy for him to carry...?"

"Sorry, Dad."

"Tell your brother that."

Sigh. "Ok. Sorry, Brian"

"Meanie."

"Have you two finished packing?"

"Yeah,"

"Yup"

"No, you haven't."

"Yes, I have."

"Dad, he hasn't. I saw him."

"Brian, what did you pack in your trunk?"

"What you told me to, Papa."

"Well let's take a look then."

"Told you he didn't pack."

Sigh "Sweetheart, I told you to pack all that was necessary for our trip. Mr. Bear, Mr. Snuffles, Mr. Sticky Toes and all your other toys are not what I meant by 'necessary'."

"But they are nesicherry, Papa. I can't sleep without Mr. Bear and Mr. Bear can't go anywhere without Mr. Snuffles and Mr. Snuffles is married with Mr. Sticky Toes and Mr. Sticky Toes needs..."

"Potter, what have I told you about letting my children watch your horrible soap operas?"

"It was just once and they are not horrible. You just don't get the jist of it."

"There is no 'jist' to understand, Potter. They have no plot, no sense of humor, their lines are atrocious, and the story line is always the same!"

Giggle "Cindy is having a ant fair with Bobby."

"It's an 'affair' Brian."

"That's what I said, Papa. A ant-fair."

"And it's not Bobby she is having the affair with but that Steve guy. I always knew it..."

"Gods, Potter! Are you listening to yourself?"

"...but now that I think about it, I think that the pool guy was the one that got Jennifer pregnant."

Sigh

Giggle. Giggle

"No more talking of pool guys or Jennifer getting knocked up. All of you!... Potter, take our trunks down to the foyer while I help Brian here to pack."

"What do I look like, a house elf?"

"Close enough."

Sigh

"Now, Brian, you can't take all these toys with you. You need clothes to wear and I don't think Mr. Sticky Toes will let you borrow his ugly out-fit while we're at the States."

"But, Papa…"

"Don't you, but Papa me. Now, lets see what we have here."

"I don't like that color."

"What do you mean you don't like this color? It's black. You like black."

"No I don't. I like green."

"Even better."

"No, too itchy."

"But you use to say it was nice and warm?"

"But, Nanny made me another one last Christmas. That one is old."

"Ok… how about this?"

"No! Grandma Cissa told me only for special o-ca-sssssi-uns."

"_Occasions_, sweetheart. Fine, we'll put this in the '_going to dinner' _pile."

"Father! Where is my Superman shirt! You know, the one that Uncle Weasel…"

"Chris! Don't call your Uncle that!"

"Sorry… Uncle _Ron _gave me for my birthday because Aunt Hermoine wouldn't let him buy me those _Switch _candies Uncle George and Fred made that I was hoping of using on Brian so I could have a little sister instead of an annoying little brother, that shirt? Have you seen it?"

"…"

"…"

"See! I told you Chris was a meanie! Papa! He wanted to turn me into a girl!"

"Only because you are an annoying little bugger!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"At least I don't wet my knickers like you do!"

"Because you still wear diapers, you big baby!"

"You're the baby! You cried when they pulled your teeth out!"

"Because it hurt! And you cry because you think there is a boggart under your bed!"

"There is! Uncle Remus said so. Right Daddy?"

"Well you're just stupid if you believe him."

"I'm not stupid! You are!"

"Argh! Will you all be quiet!"

"Daddy… he called me stupid."

"Because you are!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"SHUT UP ALL OF YOU! HOW MANY TIMES MUST I SAY IT BEFORE IT FILTERS INTO YOUR LITTLE SKULLS! QUIET! CHRISTIAN, APOLOGIZE TO YOUR BROTHER. NOW! YOUNG MAN! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THE BOTH OF YOU SCREAMING AND BEING ALL AROUND ANNOYING!"

"Draco, really must you…"

"Potter! That means you as well! I have a bloody headache because of all of your nagging! Now, Christian, I will not repeat myself. Apologize."

Sniff "Sorry, Brian… you're… not stupid." Sniff

"See, what you did, Draco? You made Chris cry."

"Well, maybe this way he'll learn not to tick me off and do as I say the first time I say it."

"But they're just boys. That's what they do."

"Well, they should have a label when they're born. '_Warning: Highly destructive and loud. May cause pre-mature aging, migraines, insomnia, ulcers, and death. Raise with caution.' _Or something like that."

"Draco, you can't die by raising your children."

"Sorry, Potter, let me fix that, '_may cause suicidal tendencies_'"

"Draco…"

"What?"

Sigh. "Nothing, why bother."

"Right."

"Father, have you seen my shirt?"

Sigh

* * *

A/N...or at least Beta's note, lol. This is Stupy posting for Kitty! So how u guys like this story so far. I personally think it's hilarious. Ain't my girl a genius? I think so, lol. Okay, so PLEASE READ & REVIEW! We greatly appreciate it. Kitty is going to be writing the next chapter soon. Though she is also writing something else (she won't tell me what that sneaky devil)! Thanks for reading!


	3. OMG! It's Harry Potter!

**Author: SilverSnitch69 **

**Rating: T**

**Disclaimer: Neither do I, nor my partner in crime/beta, own Harry Potter or any related characters. We just use them in our twisted little stories for our, and soon to be your, sick pleasure.**

**Warning: This is slash, so I hope you know what that means, if not, then I don't know what to tell you. Post-Hogwarts, and the relationship has been established. Implied m-preg, though we don't go into the details.**

**

* * *

**

**"OMG! It's Harry Potter!"**

"Father, I'm hungry."

"Me hungry, too, Papa."

Sigh "Well, that makes three of us. I'm hungry, too."

"Papa, where did Daddy go?"

"To get our port-key, sweetheart."

"What's taking him so long?"

"Heck if I know, Christian"

"Papa?"

"Mmm?"

"You don't think he got lost, do you?"

"Of course not, stupid. Dad wouldn't get lost."

"Don't call me stupid! Papa, look at Chris. He's calling me names again."

"Christian, please, it's too early in the morning. I have a headache, not to mention I'm hungry, for you to start bothering your brother. Please, baby, just stop."

"Sorry, Father. Promise I wont do it again."

Sigh.

"Papa?"

"Yes, Brian?"

"That man is looking at us funny."

Groan. "Please, not this."

_On the other side of the building…_

"Come on, come on, please move."

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Sigh.

"What the hell is taking so long?"

Sigh.

"Thank you, Ms. Najar, and have a wonderful time in Bermuda."

"Finally!"

Girly Giggle. "Have you been waiting long?"

"Almost an hour."

"Oh, my! Well, how may I help you, sir?"

"Yes, I reserved a port-key for today."

"Ok, destination?"

"The U.S."

"Name?"

"Harry Potter."

"Ok, let me see. Harry Po…"

"…"

"…"

"Is there something wrong, miss?"

"You're…you're…you're…"

"I'm…I'm, what?"

"Ha-a-a-a-r-r-r-y P-p-p-p…."

Sigh.

"P-p-o-t-t-t-e-e-r-rr."

"Yes, I'm Harry Potter. Now can you please give me my port-key. I'm in a rush you see. My family…"

"Your family!"

"Yes, my family. And they are waiting for me and …"

"OMG! You're Harry Potter!"

Sigh. "I thought we went through this?"

"I can't believe I finally get the chance to meet Harry Potter! I have to call my friends."

"My port-key, please, Ms…"

"Akopyan! Syuzanna Akopyan, but you can call me Suzy, Mr. Potter. All my friends call me that, although, they sometimes call me Stupy for some odd reason…"

Sigh

"…and another friend started calling me Suzy-Q, which I hate, mind you, and I threaten to hex her into next week if she even dare to call me that again, and she…"

"Please! Ms. Akopyan…"

"SUZY! Call me Suzy, Mr. Potter."

'Just breath, Harry, you don't really want to hex her into oblivion, it's not her fault she's obnoxious. Draco is waiting and if you don't hurry up…'Sigh. "Suzy, would you just give me my port-key and I'll give you an autograph. How's that?"

"Really?"

"Yes, really… Port-key. Now."

_Meanwhile…_

"Why is that man grinning, Father?"

"Because he wants to be hexed, Christian. Just ignore him. Both of you."

"Ok, papa."

"He's still smiling… and now he's talking to someone else and pointing over here."

"Papa, I'm scared."

"Don't worry, sweetheart, I'll protect you and your brother from those stupid little people."

"Just don't kill him or I'll tell Dad."

"Spoilsport."

"Father, you know Dad doesn't like it when you attack the reporters."

"But they deserve to be hexed."

"Even Ms. Blueberry from Witch Weekly?"

"What! She was coming on to Harry. I was just making sure she knew who he belongs to."

"Father, she was just asking if he was ok after he fell from his broom during the semi-finals."

"To you it seemed that way, but she was really trying to seduce him. Humph! How dare she try to get my Harry by acting all worried. I knew all her tricks!"

"Ok, how about Mr. Willie from the Evening Prophet?"

"Son, his name said it all. It just begged for me to hex him."

Giggle. "Mr. Willie was funny, Papa."

"Yeah, his name is funny." Snicker. "But Dad still wasn't happy you hexed him."

"Your dad was just jealous he wasn't able to hex him before I did."

Sigh.

"Christian, are they looking over here?"

"Yes, and now they have a camera."

"What are we going to do, Papa?"

"We wait and see, children. We wait and see."

_With Harry…_

"Can I have another one for a friend of mine. He is a total fan of yours, too, although, he collects more pictures of your husband than yours, but I'm sure he'll love it any way."

"Sorry, but I only promised one."

"But!…please Mr. Potter, give me one more, and I promised that'll be the only one!"

"Hey! Up there, what's the hold up!"

"Yeah, we've been waiting in line for an hour!"

"DO I LOOK LIKE I GIVE A DAMN! YOU CAN WAIT ANOTHER HOUR FOR ALL I CARE! THIS IS HARRY POTTER UP FRONT, SO GO TO HELL!"

Sigh.

"Sorry about that Mr. Potter. People are rude these days."

Groan. "Hey! I got an idea. How about you give me my port-key and then I'll run quickly to get my husband to sign his autograph so you can give it to that friend of yours. How's that?"

"Really! He'll be so happy! Make it for Ethan Hursh, please. Great! Ok, one port-key to the U.S. for you Mr. Potter. Here it is, and it's scheduled to leave in about… ten minutes. Bye, and have a nice time."

"Ten minutes!"

_With Draco…_

"Father, he's coming over here."

"Yes, I see him and… my, he's really good looking."

"Papa! I'm going to tell Daddy."

"No, you are not. Besides, I was just kidding, Sweetheart."

"Really?"

"Excuse me, but would you happen to be Mr. Draco Malfoy?"

"It's Malfoy-Potter."

"Now, Christian, don't be rude. Yes, that's me, and you are…?"

"Ethan Hursh, and may I be bold as to say you are more handsome in person than in the papers. Those pictures don't do you justice."

"Hey, loser! My father is married."

"Yeah. Papa is mewied with Daddy."

"Children please. He was just being polite."

"And even after bearing two children, I'm quiet stunned to see you have kept your figure."

"Daily exercise would help you do that."

"Father, I don't like him. Can I hex him?"

"Christian! That is quite enough."

"You are a spirited young lad, aren't you?"

"He gets it from his other father."

"And looks like him too, though the hair looks much tamer. How about this other one. What is your name?"

"Brian."

"Now you look more like your father. Very handsome."

"Think so too?"

"Huh? Oh! Mr. Potter, what a… I mean to say that… you have a nice family."

"Thank you, now leave."

"Harry! Behave. This is Ethan Hursh. Ethan this is…"

"His husband."

Sigh.

"Dad, he was hitting on him."

"What?"

"Harry, don't listen to him, he was just being polite and complimenting on the children."

"No he wasn't! Dad, he was flirting with him."

"Yeah Daddy! Hex him!"

"Umm… Mr. Potter, I assure you I wasn't flirting with your husband, I was merely… should I start running?"

"Oh, yes. Start running, and if I see you again ogling my husband I will…"

"Potter! What the hell was that for!"

"What do you mean what that was for! The guy was practically drooling all over you!"

Sneer. "Please. You are over exaggerating. He was being very friendly. Really, Potter, your jealousy is really annoying."

"My jealousy! You are the one that hexes reporters that you believe are coming on to me."

"But she was! She wasn't fooling anyone especially me. You're just too dense to realize what she was doing."

"But Mr. Willie?"

"Potter."

"Well he did have a funny name, but that still didn't merit you hexing him."

Giggle. "Willie."

"Did you get the port-key, Dad."

"Port-key? Oh! Yes, I have it. It leaves in ten, no, three minutes."

"What! Potter, what the hell took you so long!"

" Hey! It wasn't my fault that the lady was missing a few screws."

"You mean she was a fan?"

"What's the difference?"

"Touché."

* * *

A/N: Okay, I know it's been awhile (This is Stupy posting again btw). I've had this chapter for awhile on my computer, but I guess I've just been too lazy to post. Well Im on it now. Kitty is working on the next chapter, and it looked pretty dang funny from what I've seen so far. For you slashy fans, I think she has decided to up the rating a bit. Now If you have a problem with more mature stuff please tell me and we'll figure something out. As far as our other story "Rainbow Room" goes. We have worked on the plot a bit more, and we sort of know where it's going, but we're stuck on the chat text. The fact that we both started college and I started working leaves little time for us to work on it, but I shall force myself as I usually do. Okay, Please **Read and Review**. You don't know what it means to us little writers when some comments (good comments though) on our work! I wish you all slashie dreams! 333


End file.
